Becoming Real

It’s a good day to sit and write a blog post. It’s 7 degrees out with several inches of snow on the ground. I’m perfectly happy to drink tea and think. I’ve pondered ideas for my first official post and decided I’d address the implications of my business name: REAL Coaching. Each letter stands for something of value to me (Responsive, Engaged, Agile Living), each of which I’ll leave for another day. It’s the word REAL I thought I’d discuss. The other words grew out of that one, not the other way around. So, why the word Real? It isn’t meant as a way to imply that other coaching isn’t genuine or effective, by any means. Rather, I consider it a quality of being and relating that has guided my own journey and growth, and one I find vital personally. In an earlier iteration of my business I used the tag line, Get Real. It sounded like a lot of attitude, but in truth I meant it sincerely…I am deeply driven by a desire to be real in this world. And by Real I mean safe being me. What’s fundamental to the quest for Realness, though, is the responsibility it puts upon the quester… to be self-aware. Being oneself isn’t about having permission to say and do whatever is wanted, whenever is wanted. It actually demands ongoing work on one’s own Emotional Intelligence, learning to tune in, honestly, to emotions, motives, reactions and truths, even when they’re not pretty. That’s probably the hardest part – having to be Real with oneself first and to do so with compassion and...